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A journal

My Latest Posts

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  • Half four in the morning
    In my dream I am in a ship. I think I must be the one steering, although I am not really conscious of this and perhaps this is an illusion.…More
  • Words from Thich Nhat Hanh
    Hovering between moments of contentment, of ease and my habitual fear and disregulation. It is a habit of many parts of me. I remember trying to notice the micromoments, encouraged…More
  • Dreams of white trees
    When I was a kid, and then a teen, and also into my twenties, I had these recurrent dreams that I was looking for these giant white trees. Occasionally I…More
  • Just enough peace
    A couple of weeks ago, I was desperate and panicking because I was going to start my first full day of work. I was drowning in the fearful and other…More
  • Thinking about death
    Remembering my friend George, I realise he has now been dead for nearly as long he was alive. Road traffic accident. He was twenty four. Too young. Walking back past…More
  • How to talk to the worst parts of me
    https://m.youtube.com/watch?fbclid=IwAR3CH1aH7MZe814aj5QPX6-w0gKAQH4IjsEdc2e32c-AAfwdpIpaFy53ghg&v=gUV5DJb6KGs&feature=youtu.be This is a video I love and find helpful, very like Internal Family Systems, although this is not mentioned. I have borrowed some of her openings with my own…More
  • Memories of hedgehogs and the wildness of the land
    Still sick. Shivery, coughing, sweating. I have a part of me that rails against the boredom of it and another that shuts this down. And suddenly my peacemaking part, who…More
  • Sickness and talking to trees
    I can’t stop shivering. Shivering and sweating. I make it part of my weird version of zen practice, but without the sitting upright. Today I am stronger and I am…More
  • Music interlude
    Because I am in no fit state to write anything at the moment, I just wanted to briefly share my love for the Scala & Kolacny brothers. Below their version…More
  • Ancestors
    During our Imbolc celebration, a few days ago, I placed some rememberance stones onto a table covered in candles that had all blown out in the wind. Four had the…More

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